Variety: Proverbs 3v3-5

3 Let love and faithfulness never leave you; bind them round your neck, write them on the tablet of your heart.
4 Then you will win favour and a good name in the sight of God and man.
5 Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding;

Scandalous family rifts seem to hit the news with uncomfortable regularity. Take last week’s explosive revelation about the Beckham family, or Philip Yancey’s recent disclosure of an eight-year affair. Both show how public image does not fully account for the broken reality of family life.

We know humans are fallible, so it shouldn’t surprise us. Yet these sustained patterns of brokenness and deception often shock us when they come to light. I’ve been up close to situations like this, both in my personal and professional life, and they are always deeply painful for those involved, and have ripple effects on those around them. Some can’t quite believe it happened on their doorstep, among their friends, to someone they admire. For others, it’s completely believable, an acknowledgement of the reality they’ve lived through, or of the pain they’ve seen.

But here’s what doesn’t make headlines: the millions of ordinary couples choosing faithfulness. The parents daily laying down their own preferences for their kids. The families doing the hard work of reconciliation. The leaders practising transparency even when it costs them. The quiet, daily decisions to honour commitments when no-one’s watching.

This is the work we’re actually called to. Not spectacular righteousness, or carefully constructed public image, but steady faithfulness. Not the absence of temptation or struggle, but the cultivation of communities where honesty is richer than hiding, where accountability is everyday rather than exceptional, where we speak truth to one another because we love one another.

In our churches, this looks like leadership teams that ask each other hard questions and walk hard roads with each other. Small groups where vulnerability isn’t performed but practiced. Marriages where couples talk about their struggles before they become crises. Cultures where seeking help is a sign of wisdom, not weakness.

The Beckham drama will fade from the news cycle. Philip Yancey will be forgotten. Other scandals will replace them. We followers of Jesus will continue to seek to minister truth and love through the pastoral conversations, accountability relationships, marriage courses, honest friendships, love poured out in the face of failure. Not perfect communities, but truthful ones.

And perhaps that’s the most countercultural witness we can offer: communities where brokenness can be acknowledged and addressed rather than hidden and denied, where we talk of a Jesus who is powerful enough to meet us in our mess, not just our highlight reel.

London Institute for Contemporary Christianity